I don’t expect anyone to read it. It’s for me. For it to be out there. Just all of it that I remember. Venttting. Warning though. Of abuse and my stuff…
wow. You went through a lot. I am SO sorry it happened to you. I’m glad you feel that tying this out is helping you, and i want to let you know that if you ever want to talk about it, or let people know we have a phone line, and chat and well.. thank you for telling your story and hopefully someone will read it and find it helpful to them.
I guess when you’ve kept it locked inside for so long, it’s much easier to fake a smile than let free the tears that are welling up inside of you.
“Pairing men with femininity is seen as like an insult, like you’re lowering yourself. Yet women doing masculinity - not an insult to women. I think it’s safe to say that there might even be some fear of the feminine. I’ve heard this phenomenon referred to in some circles as femmephobia. So this aversion to the feminine in marketing and products is one of the outcomes of femmephobia. Another outcome is that anytime someone who is perceived as a man is aligning with anything feminine-y - it is perceived as a direct threat to Mr. Manly Man’s masculinity. You can be aggressive, you can be intolerant, you can be hateful; but don’t dare wear a dress. Or so comes, ‘you’re a fag,’ ‘you’re a pussy,’ and the violence.” - Laci Green
You Are Not Alone - LGBTQ Suicide Prevention Video
Agora also takes the national TALK line.. but if anyone see’s this video and feels more comfortable chatting online we can do that from the link on our tumblr.
do you remember threatening to beat me whenever i was sad
and saying youd give me something to cry about
or how about hitting me when i got too happy
or, more often, when i wasnt happy enough
or for saying sorry
do you remember that
no you dont
because you wiped it from your memory ! you forgot it so you could have a clean conscience. well i didnt!!! i remember everything about my childhood with you
You are very strong. Thank you for writing this and i hope you feel a little better from it. If you ever want to talk you can always do it.
I am all moved in. Things are very different with my Dad. He is sane, for one thing. On the other hand moving in has caused me to experience a new side of parenting. Although it’s lovely that there’s no more abuse, I’m not used to having someone needing to know where I am. I’m not used to having people worry about me, or having them care about the choices I make in life. It’s strange, and I’m doing my best to figure it all out. Wish me luck, lovelies.
I hope you find everything you need. This is very powerful. If you ever need anyone to talk to we are here.
This is a blog for current volunteers and those interested in more information about what we do. It is also intended to be an outreach blog for those who are in crisis or connected to someone in crisis.
We are here to listen.
Sometimes it's hard to talk about certain problems or issues with our family and friends. As trained peer counselors, our volunteers are ready to provide compassionate, non-judgmental listening for anything you want to discuss. We won't tell you how to solve your problem, but we'll help you figure out what options you might have. Our services include a FREE help-line and walk-in clinic.
